Charles Apgar

Charles G. Apgar, 87, of Chatham and Lavallette passed Friday May 31, 2024 surrounded by his beloved family. A man of exceptional character, he will be remembered for his extraordinary kindness, generosity, and respect for all people.

Charles was born on March 15, 1937 in Morristown, NJ to Charles G. Apgar Sr. and Grace Apgar (Farmer). He grew up in the town of Madison, and attended Madison High school where he played football and ran track. After graduating from Madison in 1955, Charles attended Bucknell University in Lewisburg, PA. Charles had a deep appreciation for his school, and was an active, involved student. During his time there, he continued to run track and play football. He was honored as the Offensive Captain of the Bucknell Football team his senior year, and set a punting record that held for a number of years. He was also an active member of Bucknell’s ROTC program, a member of the Phi Gamma Delta fraternity, and elected President of the B Club – an athletic club for students. He graduated from Bucknell in 1959 with a Bachelor of Science degree in Commerce and Finance, and always maintained his dedication to his school.

After college, and completing his active duty with the Army, he entered the New Jersey National Guard. Charles was Honorably Discharged in 1968 with the rank of Captain after 8 years. 

Charles worked for over 40 years in the oil industry, in various management positions for Shell Oil Company and later the Amerada Hess Corporation.  As a manager, Charles took his role seriously and always led by example.

Charles was a man of rare outstanding kindness. Those that knew him will remember him most for his gentle disposition and limitless compassion. As a dedicated father, he spent years coaching various sports teams for his children. He was a family man who enjoyed spending summers with his children and grandchildren at the beach, where he taught them all to bodysurf. As a person who enjoyed the quiet moments in life, he was an avid reader, gardener, and a Mr. Fix-it handyman around the house. His favorite place was the beach in Lavallette, where he spent his summers and became a local legend for his bodysurfing and sand castle building skills – interests that he continued well into his seventies.

His favorite holiday was Christmas because it allowed him to be together with his family, and each year he impressed friends and family alike with his impeccable wrapping skills. In his free time, he was known to listen to the Beach Boys and Frank Sinatra, and often sang while completing chores around the house. An avid sports spectator, Charles was a lifelong Yankees and New York Giants fan. 

Charles met his wife, Phyllis, as teenagers in Lavallette. Growing first as friends, they enjoyed spending time together on the beach. They married on October 7, 1961. One of Charles and Phyllis’s favorite activities to do together was to dance together in the privacy of their home or go out dancing with friends. Their favorite music to dance to was 50s and 60s rock-and-roll or slow dances, and they are often remembered for dancing together on Christmas Eve by the tree. Together, the two had 3 loving children, 9 grandchildren and 3 step-grandchildren. They enjoyed over 62 years of marriage. 

Charles is survived by his beloved wife, Phyllis; three children: Heather Murphy and her husband Brian, Charles W. “Chad” Apgar and his partner Kara DuRie, and Tamara Vander May and her husband Clifford;  nine grandchildren: Bryn Murphy, Owen Murphy, Charles W. “CJ” Apgar Jr., Kendra Apgar, Cory Apgar, Daria Vander May, Elise Vander May, Garrett Vander May, and Callen Vander May; and three step grandchildren: Ella DuRie, Owen DuRie, and Teddy DuRie.