Joan Mary Tanis

Joan Mary Tanis, age 91, of Atlantic Highlands, formerly of Wayne, passed away Tuesday, September 17, 2019.

She was born in Jessup, Pennsylvania in 1928 to John and Margaretta Kelly.  Margaretta moved her family to Newark and later Bloomfield during the Great Depression. Joan graduated from Clifton High School, Class of 1946.  While in high school, she was the president of Tri-Y, a YMCA community service program for young women and was also active in the Inter-American Friendship Club, the Yearbook staff, the graduation committee, the Girls’ Athletic Association, and Glee Club.  The caption in her high school yearbook reads “’Tis her thinking of others that makes you think of her.”  Following high school, she graduated from Mountainside School of Nursing, Class of 1949, as a Registered Nurse.

Just out of nursing school Joan worked at Paterson General Hospital, then did a short stint with nursing friends at a hospital in southern Florida before returning to Paterson General.  It was after her return to New Jersey that she met her future husband, Joseph Tanis.  After the birth of their daughter Pamela, Joan dedicated herself as a stay-at-home mom for several years.  When Pam began junior high school, Joan again took on work as a Registered Nurse in the operating room at Wayne General Hospital.  She worked there for many years before retiring in 1993.

Joan and Joe met on a blind date on a rainy evening in 1952.  They dated a couple of times but Joan thought he just wasn’t the right guy for her.  She ran into Joe again the next summer on the beach at Avon by the Sea, where Joe would summer with his dear friends Tom Rumana and Bob Roe.  They got back together again and truly fell in love.  They ran into a bit of trouble when they went to marry, as Joan was Catholic and Joe was Episcopalian.  When Joan approached her priest, he said marrying Joe would be a mortal sin.  When they sought the advice of Joe’s pastor, he told Joe (right in front of Joan!) that there were several pretty girls in the choir he should consider.  Ironically, Joan and Joe shared a very strong common bond of faith and devotion to God.  Yet because of old school church rules, it was a four-year struggle before their love won the battle and they married on October 27, 1956 at St. Paul’s Episcopal Church in Paterson.  They honeymooned in Atlantic City and shared a loving and devoted marriage of forty years. Joan recently recounted how they moved to Wayne from Clifton at the height of a severe snowstorm in December 1960.  She lived in Wayne for almost fifty years before moving to the retirement community at Seabrook Village in Tinton Falls and more recently Atlantic Highlands.

Joan had a quiet and reserved personality in comparison to Joe’s loud and raucous demeanor. This changed quickly, however, when Pam began school and Joan thrust herself with enthusiasm into PTA and Girl Scout activities, acting also as a classroom helper and chaperone for class trips.  It was then she stepped out of her comfort zone and came out of her shell.  When it came to parties Joan was usually a reluctant participant but once she got there she was always the life of the party.  Joan had a great sense of humor and was a terrific cook.  She was adventurous with both recipes and ingredients, a trait she passed on to her daughter Pam.  Her special ingredient of love in her lasagna will be greatly missed. Joan enjoyed watching Oprah and The View on television, loved maple walnut fudge, summer vacations in Point Pleasant and Lavallette, fishing at the Jersey Shore, going to the movies, and listening to Frank Sinatra.  She also loved everything Irish including music, food, and especially corned beef and cabbage.  Joan was a pet lover her whole life and enjoyed babysitting her grand-dogs Remy and Sherry, who hopefully greeted her on the Rainbow Bridge to Heaven.  Most recently she enjoyed weekly visits from her grand-dogs Denver and Stoli.  Although Joan imagined she had a reputation as the “bad kid” at Care One King James in Atlantic Highlands, many of the care givers there were truly saddened by her passing and said she was a favorite.

Joan was the loving wife of forty years to the late Joseph R. Tanis (d.1996); she was the loving mother of Pamela Johnson and her husband Peter of Atlantic Highlands; cherished grandmother of Kimberly Petke and her husband Mike, Meredith Kenney, and Matthew Johnson; and dearly loved great-grandmother of Dylan Petke, Mason Petke, and Lilly Kenney.  Joan was the youngest of eight children and was given the nickname Peche (little peach) by her siblings who adored her. She was predeceased by her brothers Edward Walsh (d.1960), William “Bill” Walsh (d.1970), Francis “Frank” Walsh (d.1978), Richard “Dick” Walsh (d.1998), Raymond Walsh (d.1994) and sisters Margaret Walsh Colleran (d.1977) and Rose Walsh (d.1915); she was also the loved aunt of twenty-one nieces and nephews and lots of great-nieces and great-nephews.  

In lieu of flowers memorial donations to Ascend Hospice, 65 Jackson Drive, Suite 103, Cranford, NJ 07016 would be appreciated.