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October 22, 2008
Services
Funeral services will be held Monday, October 27, 2008 at 9 AM from the Vander May Wayne Colonial Funeral Home, 567 Ratzer Road, Wayne then to Our Lady of Consolation RC Church, Wayne where at 10 AM a Funeral Mass will be offered. Friends may visit with the family at the funeral home on Sunday from 2-4, 7-9 PM.
He will be laid to rest at Christ the King Cemetery in Franklin Lakes with his loved wife of fifty-two years Alice Traynor.
John J. Traynor age 83 of Wayne died Wednesday, October 22, 2008 at home after receiving the love of his family who were constantly at his bedside. He died quietly and peacefully after a courageous battle with brain cancer.
The following essay is a testimony of love, devotion, pride and remembrance carved in warm tribute to a lifetime’s accomplishments.
The Traynor family is left not to mourn his long and prosperous life, but to cherish the memories of the contributions he made to his family, friends, customers and the community. He was a man who always chose the high road in life and in so doing was held in high esteem by those who had the privilege of knowing him.
We are the language of God in this life’s worldly journey and John’s life was a ballad that evoked His image.
“They Just Don’t Make ‘Em Like They Used To”
The Story of John J. Traynor, My Father – and Hero By Tim Traynor
“They just don’t make ‘em like they used to.”
Today, it’s all about style; my Dad had substance, panache, kindness beyond belief, the extraordinary power of forgiveness, the strength of his word as his bond, generosity that knew no bounds, a sense of humor that could knock you over (laughing, of course), the ability to not only remember your name but your life’s story as well, and an Irish twinkle in his eye that suggested mischief, but really was the glistening star of his warmth as a person of such great character, a person of humility rich with honesty and integrity.
Yeah, that’s my Dad.
I swear this is all true. In fact, I left a bunch of great things about him out for fear you would think this is some “standard issue obituary” where only the good stuff gets mentioned. But then…you wouldn’t have known John J. Traynor, my father. You see, he was all these things and more – just ask anyone who knew him! And everyone who knew him at least liked him, though most loved him!
For some reason, the middle initial “J” was really important to my father - maybe because his father and only sibling, his brother, were both named “James.” But I think there was more to it than that; I think that being from the poor “East side” of Wilmington, DE made my Dad feel special to have such a regal-sounding name: John J. Traynor. I got lucky when I was born because I got my father’s first name as my middle name, meaning I got the all-important “J” also!
When my Dad was only 19 years old, he volunteered to join the Army and go overseas to fight in World War II. Growing up, he rarely talked about the war, although he DID make sure we knew he made it to the rank of “Captain.” Boy…was he proud of that! It was only in his later years, when I showed a great deal of interest in his WWII experience that I found out just how great a role my father played in “the greatest generation.”
Identified early on as a possible officer because of his smarts and his affability, he was enrolled in OCS (Officer Candidates School). He was the youngest one in his class, and he was often called “Kid” by the others, though clearly they liked him. I can almost hear them saying, “Hey kid…you got a cigarette?” Knowing my Dad, he probably gave them his last one without telling them.
Here’s the coolest part of my Dad’s WWII experience. Back in the 1940s, the Armed Services were segregated – black guys and white guys separated into their own units. It’s hard to imagine these days, but that’s what it was back then. My Dad was approached, after he finished OCS and became a Captain in the Army, about leading a company of 100 men – all black. He was asked, “Are you prejudiced?” My Dad said, “No. Why?” He was told that several Captains were approached about leading this company of all-black men, and that they had declined to do it. My Dad was asked, “Will you do it?” My Dad, in one of his proudest moments for me said, “Do it? I would be honored.” And so he became the much-loved Captain of an all-black unit, whose men grew to respect him and willingly and selflessly follow his orders. My dad loved them back!
He led a “transportation unit” of trucks and vehicles that were used to constantly supply and re-supply the front lines, day after day, in Belgium and France. He told me how proud he was of “his men,” and how great they were, and he wondered aloud how people could so easily dismiss them “just because of their skin color.” That helped shape my life and my thinking, especially how proud I was of my father for being a man – not just a white man.
He told me he “never shot anyone,” but his truck supply line and he and his men were sometimes strafed by German aircraft as they drove along the country roads. He told me the routine was always the same: park the trucks along both sides of the road (that made it harder for the machine gunners to hit them), and jump out and under the trucks and just pray that the bullets wouldn’t hit the gas tank of the truck you were beneath. Thank God, because they never did. I will always think of my Dad as a war hero – the kind that did the dirty work but rarely got the credit. He told me he didn’t want any credit; he “just wanted us to win the war and go home.” He got both his wishes!
After marrying his hometown sweetheart, Alice Ford, John wanted to eventually start his own business. He realized that dream in the early 1950s when he started his own Sales Rep Agency out of his garage in Clifton, NJ. He sold plumbing and water drainage specialties, having convinced Speakman Company of Wilmington, DE and Jay R. Smith Mfg. co. of Union, NJ to let him sell their wares in the Northern NJ Territory. “John J. Traynor Associates, Inc.” was founded as a fledgling company – with my Dad as its President and our next-door neighbor as its Executive Secretary. My Dad would “jump the fence” to get a letter typed.
And then one day, John met Bernie Dolan at a church fundraiser. They hit it off immediately after they were paired together as a Team to raise money. John found out that Bernie was selling soap for Colgate Palmolive. My Dad said, “You’re in soap, and I’m in water. We should get together.” And so they did.
In essence, Dolan & Traynor was founded that day, even though John and Bernie did a little back-and-forth between their Manufacturers and their own “rep” agencies for some years. In 1965, the bond was finally made. Bernie Dolan and John Traynor officially became “Dolan & Traynor, Inc.”
The story has become folklore around “D&T.” They flipped a coin to determine the order of the names for the new company. Obviously, Bernie Dolan won that coin flip. They flipped the coin again to see who would become President – John Traynor won that one. And then they decided the most important thing of all: if they ever came to an impasse in business, they would flip the coin a third time and be bound by its outcome. “We never had to flip that coin,” my father would proudly tell anyone who would listen.
After the two coin flips, they shook hands and said, “There…it’s done.” And so it was. And to this day, the only formal agreement between the Dolans and the Traynors to be in business together is the two flips of that one coin. Amazing, huh?
Imagine a world today that takes your word as your bond, and respects the decisions decided by a coin flip, and cemented with a handshake. More likely today, a 250-page document would be drawn up to sign, scaring everyone who had to sign it.
Oh…how I wish times were like they were then.
The ensuing years allowed my Dad, my personal hero, to show what he was made of – and boy did he ever! I’m quite sure they broke the mold after he was made.
Yes, John J. Traynor was a good man, a kind man, a gentle man, a generous man, a great business man, a wonderful partner and friend, an inspiration to all who met him, and a mentor to me – someone I always looked up to and wanted to be like. I remember saying to myself, “If you try and try and try, you just might be able to be half the man he is.” And so that is what I have spent my whole life doing – trying to be just like my old man.
Once in a while, someone will say to me, “You remind me of your father.” And I have to hide my fist-pump as I say “Yes!” to myself.
My Dad made it to just 10 days shy of his 84th birthday. How lucky we all were to have him for all those years.
Yeah…they just don’t make ‘em like they used to.
God speed, Dad. The only pain I can imagine that will be greater than losing you will be the pain of missing you. Oh, how I will miss you…forever and ever.
With all my heart,
Tim Your Son,
Written by Tim -- on behalf of the Traynor Family
John was predeceased by his wife Alice (nee Ford) Traynor in 2005 and his daughter Joanne Wilkinson in 2003 and his brother James F. Traynor died earlier.
Surviving are three sons Daniel F. Traynor of Wayne, Timothy J. Traynor and his wife Roseann of Bloomingdale, Christopher J. Traynor and his wife Noreen of Wayne; two daughters Mary T. Trella and her husband Matthew of Cape May and Colleen M. Tompkins and her husband Daniel of Clifton; ten grandchildren Katie Zinsmeister and her husband Michael, Matthew and Christian Trella, Snowflake Zibura Traynor, Tracy Wilkinson, Jesse and Michael Traynor; Holly, Meghan and Claire Traynor; one great grandson Riley Zibura Traynor.
Those planning an expression of sympathy in John’s memory are asked to consider The Little Sisters of The Poor, 185 Salem Chase Road, Newark, Delaware 19713.
If you would like to send a private condolence directly to the family use this condolence section.
Funeral services will be held Monday, October 27, 2008 at 9 AM from the Vander May Wayne Colonial Funeral Home, 567 Ratzer Road, Wayne then to Our Lady of Consolation RC Church, Wayne where at 10 AM a Funeral Mass will be offered. Friends may visit with the family at the funeral home on Sunday from 2-4, 7-9 PM.
He will be laid to rest at Christ the King Cemetery in Franklin Lakes with his loved wife of fifty-two years Alice Traynor.
October 22, 2008
Services
Funeral services will be held Monday, October 27, 2008 at 9 AM from the Vander May Wayne Colonial Funeral Home, 567 Ratzer Road, Wayne then to Our Lady of Consolation RC Church, Wayne where at 10 AM a Funeral Mass will be offered. Friends may visit with the family at the funeral home on Sunday from 2-4, 7-9 PM.
He will be laid to rest at Christ the King Cemetery in Franklin Lakes with his loved wife of fifty-two years Alice Traynor.
John J. Traynor age 83 of Wayne died Wednesday, October 22, 2008 at home after receiving the love of his family who were constantly at his bedside. He died quietly and peacefully after a courageous battle with brain cancer.
The following essay is a testimony of love, devotion, pride and remembrance carved in warm tribute to a lifetime’s accomplishments.
The Traynor family is left not to mourn his long and prosperous life, but to cherish the memories of the contributions he made to his family, friends, customers and the community. He was a man who always chose the high road in life and in so doing was held in high esteem by those who had the privilege of knowing him.
We are the language of God in this life’s worldly journey and John’s life was a ballad that evoked His image.
“They Just Don’t Make ‘Em Like They Used To”
The Story of John J. Traynor, My Father – and Hero By Tim Traynor
“They just don’t make ‘em like they used to.”
Today, it’s all about style; my Dad had substance, panache, kindness beyond belief, the extraordinary power of forgiveness, the strength of his word as his bond, generosity that knew no bounds, a sense of humor that could knock you over (laughing, of course), the ability to not only remember your name but your life’s story as well, and an Irish twinkle in his eye that suggested mischief, but really was the glistening star of his warmth as a person of such great character, a person of humility rich with honesty and integrity.
Yeah, that’s my Dad.
I swear this is all true. In fact, I left a bunch of great things about him out for fear you would think this is some “standard issue obituary” where only the good stuff gets mentioned. But then…you wouldn’t have known John J. Traynor, my father. You see, he was all these things and more – just ask anyone who knew him! And everyone who knew him at least liked him, though most loved him!
For some reason, the middle initial “J” was really important to my father - maybe because his father and only sibling, his brother, were both named “James.” But I think there was more to it than that; I think that being from the poor “East side” of Wilmington, DE made my Dad feel special to have such a regal-sounding name: John J. Traynor. I got lucky when I was born because I got my father’s first name as my middle name, meaning I got the all-important “J” also!
When my Dad was only 19 years old, he volunteered to join the Army and go overseas to fight in World War II. Growing up, he rarely talked about the war, although he DID make sure we knew he made it to the rank of “Captain.” Boy…was he proud of that! It was only in his later years, when I showed a great deal of interest in his WWII experience that I found out just how great a role my father played in “the greatest generation.”
Identified early on as a possible officer because of his smarts and his affability, he was enrolled in OCS (Officer Candidates School). He was the youngest one in his class, and he was often called “Kid” by the others, though clearly they liked him. I can almost hear them saying, “Hey kid…you got a cigarette?” Knowing my Dad, he probably gave them his last one without telling them.
Here’s the coolest part of my Dad’s WWII experience. Back in the 1940s, the Armed Services were segregated – black guys and white guys separated into their own units. It’s hard to imagine these days, but that’s what it was back then. My Dad was approached, after he finished OCS and became a Captain in the Army, about leading a company of 100 men – all black. He was asked, “Are you prejudiced?” My Dad said, “No. Why?” He was told that several Captains were approached about leading this company of all-black men, and that they had declined to do it. My Dad was asked, “Will you do it?” My Dad, in one of his proudest moments for me said, “Do it? I would be honored.” And so he became the much-loved Captain of an all-black unit, whose men grew to respect him and willingly and selflessly follow his orders. My dad loved them back!
He led a “transportation unit” of trucks and vehicles that were used to constantly supply and re-supply the front lines, day after day, in Belgium and France. He told me how proud he was of “his men,” and how great they were, and he wondered aloud how people could so easily dismiss them “just because of their skin color.” That helped shape my life and my thinking, especially how proud I was of my father for being a man – not just a white man.
He told me he “never shot anyone,” but his truck supply line and he and his men were sometimes strafed by German aircraft as they drove along the country roads. He told me the routine was always the same: park the trucks along both sides of the road (that made it harder for the machine gunners to hit them), and jump out and under the trucks and just pray that the bullets wouldn’t hit the gas tank of the truck you were beneath. Thank God, because they never did. I will always think of my Dad as a war hero – the kind that did the dirty work but rarely got the credit. He told me he didn’t want any credit; he “just wanted us to win the war and go home.” He got both his wishes!
After marrying his hometown sweetheart, Alice Ford, John wanted to eventually start his own business. He realized that dream in the early 1950s when he started his own Sales Rep Agency out of his garage in Clifton, NJ. He sold plumbing and water drainage specialties, having convinced Speakman Company of Wilmington, DE and Jay R. Smith Mfg. co. of Union, NJ to let him sell their wares in the Northern NJ Territory. “John J. Traynor Associates, Inc.” was founded as a fledgling company – with my Dad as its President and our next-door neighbor as its Executive Secretary. My Dad would “jump the fence” to get a letter typed.
And then one day, John met Bernie Dolan at a church fundraiser. They hit it off immediately after they were paired together as a Team to raise money. John found out that Bernie was selling soap for Colgate Palmolive. My Dad said, “You’re in soap, and I’m in water. We should get together.” And so they did.
In essence, Dolan & Traynor was founded that day, even though John and Bernie did a little back-and-forth between their Manufacturers and their own “rep” agencies for some years. In 1965, the bond was finally made. Bernie Dolan and John Traynor officially became “Dolan & Traynor, Inc.”
The story has become folklore around “D&T.” They flipped a coin to determine the order of the names for the new company. Obviously, Bernie Dolan won that coin flip. They flipped the coin again to see who would become President – John Traynor won that one. And then they decided the most important thing of all: if they ever came to an impasse in business, they would flip the coin a third time and be bound by its outcome. “We never had to flip that coin,” my father would proudly tell anyone who would listen.
After the two coin flips, they shook hands and said, “There…it’s done.” And so it was. And to this day, the only formal agreement between the Dolans and the Traynors to be in business together is the two flips of that one coin. Amazing, huh?
Imagine a world today that takes your word as your bond, and respects the decisions decided by a coin flip, and cemented with a handshake. More likely today, a 250-page document would be drawn up to sign, scaring everyone who had to sign it.
Oh…how I wish times were like they were then.
The ensuing years allowed my Dad, my personal hero, to show what he was made of – and boy did he ever! I’m quite sure they broke the mold after he was made.
Yes, John J. Traynor was a good man, a kind man, a gentle man, a generous man, a great business man, a wonderful partner and friend, an inspiration to all who met him, and a mentor to me – someone I always looked up to and wanted to be like. I remember saying to myself, “If you try and try and try, you just might be able to be half the man he is.” And so that is what I have spent my whole life doing – trying to be just like my old man.
Once in a while, someone will say to me, “You remind me of your father.” And I have to hide my fist-pump as I say “Yes!” to myself.
My Dad made it to just 10 days shy of his 84th birthday. How lucky we all were to have him for all those years.
Yeah…they just don’t make ‘em like they used to.
God speed, Dad. The only pain I can imagine that will be greater than losing you will be the pain of missing you. Oh, how I will miss you…forever and ever.
With all my heart,
Tim Your Son,
Written by Tim -- on behalf of the Traynor Family
John was predeceased by his wife Alice (nee Ford) Traynor in 2005 and his daughter Joanne Wilkinson in 2003 and his brother James F. Traynor died earlier.
Surviving are three sons Daniel F. Traynor of Wayne, Timothy J. Traynor and his wife Roseann of Bloomingdale, Christopher J. Traynor and his wife Noreen of Wayne; two daughters Mary T. Trella and her husband Matthew of Cape May and Colleen M. Tompkins and her husband Daniel of Clifton; ten grandchildren Katie Zinsmeister and her husband Michael, Matthew and Christian Trella, Snowflake Zibura Traynor, Tracy Wilkinson, Jesse and Michael Traynor; Holly, Meghan and Claire Traynor; one great grandson Riley Zibura Traynor.
Those planning an expression of sympathy in John’s memory are asked to consider The Little Sisters of The Poor, 185 Salem Chase Road, Newark, Delaware 19713.
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