Monroe Aboyoun

A tribute to Monroe Aboyoun

We honor and celebrate the life of Monroe Aboyoun of Wayne, NJ, who passed away peacefully at home on Tuesday, August 30, 2022.  Monroe was 90 years old.

Monroe was living proof that your past doesn’t have to define your future.  He was born of humble beginnings in Paterson, NJ to Charles and Manira Aboyoun on January 9, 1932.  Monroe was the youngest of seven children and his mother Manira tragically passed away during his birth.  Monroe spent the first 8 years of his life living at the home of his mother’s best friend, Mary and Abraham Ablahani, along with their seven other children, who became his foster family and who loved and raised him as their own.  He moved into his father’s home, learning of, and meeting his six older siblings for the first time at the age of 8, and spent time living with cousins in Brooklyn, NY.

Navigating so much change in his early years taught Monroe that hard work and effort builds self-esteem and independence.  As the youngest in a poor household, Monroe was expected to pull his weight at home. He took his first job at 8 years old - shining shoes at a Paterson barber shop for pennies. He would go on to deliver ice from a wagon and sweep a soda shop floor.  One day he found a dollar bill while sweeping the soda store floor and even though it was a fortune in those days, he turned it in to his boss.  From that day forward, his boss at the soda shop, perhaps testing Monroe’s character with that dollar bill, trusted him implicitly.  

Monroe was a trustworthy, honorable, and exceptionally kind man who proved that character is destiny.  His calm, sunny personality and instinctive curiosity and intelligence helped him grow into a real “people person” as well as a respected and trusted leader who never raised his voice.

Monroe met the love of his life, Carol Agnello, in 1951 on a blind date. He was instantly smitten the moment he laid eyes on her, and later described her as “a real knock out” who was “movie star gorgeous.”  Carol was attending college at the time, and although all his brothers worked in a factory, Monroe knew he would have to attend college too if he was to be worthy of such a terrific woman. After his first semester in college, however, Monroe realized he simply couldn’t afford the tuition.  One of his professors became aware of his situation and encouraged him to take a test to apply for a scholarship.  Monroe did and he received a full scholarship, graduating from Seton Hall University with a degree in Business. Soon afterwards, he proposed, and Monroe and Carol were married on June 29, 1957.

Monroe cherished Carol and he was a thoroughly devoted husband to her over the nearly sixty-five years they were married.  He also loved Carol’s parents and they adored him, treating him as if he was their own son. Monroe always said he got “the whole package” by marrying into such a loving and kind family, and he in turn was very good to Carol’s parents as they got older, taking care of them every way he could.  

Together Monroe and Carol raised three beautiful and talented children, their daughters Jane and Susan and their son, David.  He and Carol enjoyed exposing their children to all the world had to offer.  They loved the theatre, visiting museums, and traveling with their children: they traveled to Europe, all around the United States, Hawaii, Mexico, and the Caribbean. Road trips with AAA TripTik’s as their guide were also commonplace.  Monroe would drive and Carol would be the tour guide, following the prompts of the AAA TripTik.  Carol was an artist with an artist’s temperament, while Monroe was the rock and the calm in the storm. The two balanced one another perfectly. They lived a very full and blessed life together until Carol’s passing on November 18, 2021.

After he married, Monroe found a job with the Metropolitan Life Insurance Company, and he prospered there, rising to Agency Vice President.  Monroe was always more interested in others than himself.  He loved people, was a good speaker, and most of all an outstanding listener. Unique for his time, Monroe was an inclusive leader, and he would teach others how to leverage their best qualities to their advantage at work. Monroe was able to take a struggling office and turn it around into a nationally recognized producer for the company. His family would attend Met Life conventions with Monroe and saw him receive many accolades – professional and personal – over the years. Monroe worked for the Metropolitan Life Insurance Company his entire career, retiring in 1996.

Despite his many achievements at work, Monroe felt that his greatest accomplishment was without a doubt his family.  He was ahead of his time in his approach to raising a family and he epitomized what it was to be a great husband, father, and grandfather. As a young father in the 1970’s, for example, he would wake his three children in the morning by asking them what they wanted for breakfast and lunch.  Carol called him a “short-order cook,” as he would individually make their breakfast and lunch orders.  Most school lunches he made consisted of a sandwich, a piece of fruit, cookies, and money for milk and ice cream.  Speaking of ice cream, Monroe had a lifelong love of it that he happily shared with his children and grandchildren every chance he got.

Monroe especially loved spending time with his six grandchildren – Adrienne, Chris, Ben, Luke, Leslie and Jordan – and he led them on trips well into his 80’s.  Visits to all kinds of places were planned, including the Intrepid, Liberty Science Center, Cirque du Soleil, the Bronx and Turtleback zoos, Children’s Theatre at NJ PAC and Broadway shows in New York City, as well as teaching his grandchildren to swim.

Monroe and Carol were generous people who had many friends, looked after too many animals to mention and actively participated in their church and community.  Monroe also followed the ethos that a healthy body is a healthy mind, spending hours in the pool swimming or working out at the gym.  He stayed physically fit all his life and prided himself on his mobility, as that allowed him to help others.

Monroe will always be remembered for his words of encouragement and his positive outlook in everything he did. He was resilient, supportive, generous and he truly loved life.  Recently, as he contemplated his own passing, he shared that he had no regrets. Monroe was grateful for the life he led, proud of his family, and appreciated his good fortune to lead a life and devote his energy to the things he valued most.  Most of all, however, his family are grateful for him – for leading by example, for his unfaltering support and for his unconditional love.  They know above all how lucky they were to have such a remarkable, special man as their father, grandfather, brother, and friend, which is what also makes saying goodbye so hard.

Monroe is survived by his three beloved children and their partners: Jane Aboyoun and her wife Emma van Rooyen of Manhasset, NY, David Aboyoun of New York, NY, Susan LoFrumento and her partner Ivan Kimball of Morristown, NJ; his six adored grandchildren: Adrienne, Jordan and Leslie Aboyoun, and Christopher, Benjamin, and Luke LoFrumento; and his sisters Mary Rigoloso-White and Lynn Snihur.  Monroe was preceded in death by his siblings John, George, Charles, Michael, Elias and Anna Ablahani, and Lee, Joan, Sam, Ned, and Edward Aboyoun.

In lieu of flowers, Monroe asked that donations in his memory be sent to: St Marys Church, 17 Pompton Ave., Pompton Lakes, NJ 07442.