Shirley Cantwell

Shirley A. Cantwell, age 93, of Lincoln Park and formerly of Packanack Lake in Wayne, passed peacefully at her home on Tuesday, August 23, 2022, while in the company of her loving family.

The youngest of Bert and Sarah “Sadie” (O’Rourke) Waldorf’s six children, Shirley was born and raised in Dubuque, Iowa.

After completing high school, Shirley worked as a secretary for a year. She had a niece named Gloria and, while Shirley was technically Gloria’s “Aunt Shirley” the two were so close in age that they were more like friends. Gloria happened to also be an aspiring singer and piano player who performed on the road in many varied venues but, living in an age when female musicians would never travel alone, Gloria needed a chaperone. Who better than Shirley? It turned out to be a win-win arrangement and consequently, the two of them had a lot of fun and got to see much of the Midwest. One Sunday morning, Shirley’s niece Gloria and Gloria’s boyfriend Ray attended mass at St. Joan of Arc Church in Okauchee Lake, Wisconsin. That morning, Gloria invited her Aunt Shirley and Ray invited his friend Tom Cantwell. During that encounter, Shirley and Tom hit it off rather well. That morning in church served as a springboard into a loving relationship which ultimately led to their marriage on Saturday, April 25, 1953 in that same church where Shirley and Tom first met. After the wedding ceremony, the newlyweds took a road trip to Florida for their honeymoon.

Shirley and Tom’s first home together was in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. As time went on, they started a family and Shirley settled into her much-enjoyed role of wife, mother, and homemaker. Tom’s profession in sales necessitated numerous moves all over the U.S. With the purchase in 1970 of a home at 100 Oakwood Drive, they ultimately landed in a little lake community in the town of Wayne called Packanack Lake. By this point, they were the parents of six children. Unfortunately, in 1987, at the young age of just 61, Tom passed away. Shirley remained in their home in Wayne until 1992 when she moved to Lincoln Park where she was living to the present.

Shirley was the consummate mother and homemaker who viewed her role to be as important as in reality, it truly was. With Tom frequently away on business, Shirley was the nurturing and stabilizing force in her children’s lives. It wasn’t always easy raising her family but she did it with just the right measure of grace and grit. Up until about 1980, she could still beat any of her kids in an arm-wrestling challenge. Her son Kevin recalls the time he came home to find his minibike in the garbage can. Kevin wasn’t sure how Mom managed to lift it into that can, but he knew she didn’t want him to have it because she said it’s too dangerous and didn’t want him to get hurt. Shirley was also the best cook in the world!  She herself was a real foodie, never finding a food she didn’t like. Her family loved her cooking as did her children’s friends. Mrs. Cantwell always made enough food to feed an army!  There was always plenty, and her children’s friends were always welcome to stay for dinner!  Shirley loved the family trips they took to Long Beach Island and was always welcoming with her “you’re welcome to eat here and stay the night.”  She was also a great baker! Come late October, the house began to smell like Christmas from all the cookies that Shirley began baking from that time, right up to December 25th. With six growing kids, most of those cookies never made it out of the house but Shirley managed to hide just enough of them to give to extended family and friends. Shirley was also the “hostess with the most-est”.  She found great joy in hosting all the big holiday get-togethers and it only became more loud and more crowded in the house when her precious grandchildren came along. Speaking of her grandchildren; as a new grandma, Shirley thought it would be fun to always have a jar of M&M’s out when they came to visit so that they could help themselves. It became a great tradition but quite frankly, her grandchildren were far from the only ones to frequently dip their hands in that jar. In addition to hosting her own family, Shirley was a frequent entertainer of her and Tom’s friends.

Shirley was an avid reader. A regular at the Wayne Public Library she was known for frequently checking out the new arrivals and reading them as fast as the librarians could put them on the shelf. She read the Record newspaper from cover to cover daily, and she kept her mind sharp by completing the paper’s crossword puzzle or by playing scrabble, especially with her son-in-law Rob or her best friend Betty. Every day at 5 PM, it was time for her daily martini with crackers and cheese. That tradition started with her husband Tom and continued for the rest of Shirley’s life, oftentimes later in life with her friend Betty while the two of them talked on the phone. In later years Shirley’s kids gifted her with an iPad. She took a great liking to Facebook as it afforded her with the ability to keep up with the happenings of her family.

With her job as mom largely behind her, Shirley got to accompany Tom on his business trips throughout the USA and much of Europe. They loved traveling together and it was a great way to see many interesting places. Shirley also enjoyed the comradery of Tom’s business associates and wives.  

Along with Shirley’s love for her family was her love and devotion to God. A lifetime church attender, when the family moved to Wayne, she joined Immaculate Heart of Mary Church and when she moved to Lincoln Park, she became a faithful parishioner of St. Joseph’s Roman Catholic Church.

Shirley’s family described her as a remarkable woman! She was a sincerely kind, patient and accepting person and the greatest mother and grandmother who never stopped worrying about her family because of her great love and devotion to them.  

Shirley was the beloved wife of Thomas Cantwell, blessed in a loving marriage until his passing in 1987. She was the most loving mother of: Thomas Cantwell, IV and his wife Patricia of Franklin Lakes, Kathleen Anthony and her late husband Lee of Dana Point, CA, Timothy Cantwell and his wife Sandra of Wayne, Kevin Cantwell and his wife Michele of Wayne, Terrence Cantwell and his wife Sheila of Montville, and Cynthia Balfour and her husband Robert of Pompton Lakes; adoring grandmother of Erik and wife Alyssa, Thomas, V and wife Hanna, Kristen and husband Thomas, Jeanette, Dannielle and husband Taylor, Jessica, Colleen, Kelly, Terry, Kyle, and Sarah; cherished great-grandmother of Annabella and Thomas, VI; and dear aunt of numerous nieces and nephews. Shirley was predeceased by her five siblings: Mildred, Lorraine, Hazel, Sister Pat, and Bill.

Those planning an expression of sympathy in Shirley’s name are asked to consider:

St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital

Memorial Processing

501 St. Jude Place

Memphis, TN 38105-9959

You can also donate online by clicking here (www.stjude.org)